Top 13 things we will never understand about our English friends
The English did not wait for Brexit to display their differences. And by wanting to do things their way too much, there are bound to be times when it really becomes nonsense! The worst part is that they don’t even realize it and justify their little eccentricities with traditions from their homeland. English humor, no doubt!
1. Their passion for queues
The British love queues where nothing protrudes, whether at the entrance to the post office, a supermarket, at a bus stop, or even more improbably: at the counter of a pub! Even if you don’t see it distinctly, there is an invisible queue that everyone blindly respects (logic). As for free riders, they will quickly be put back in their place, that is to say the one that corresponds to the order of their arrival.
2. Their addiction to carpeting
And not the one that smokes, real carpet on the floor, sometimes even on the walls, because it’s cozy! It even happens that we find it in the bathroom or the WC, because, it is well known, there is no greater pleasure than leaving a few drops on the carpet!
3. Preferring to drink cider rather than beer
Cider has become in recent years the most consumed alcoholic drink each year in the UK! It is thus consumed each year 10 times more than beers. They may call it “cider” to add local color, but the cliché of the English lad with his pint of mousse in his hand, replaced by fermented apple juice, takes quite a hit behind the back of the neck.
Giving the name of an insect that is useless to a collective sport reminds us that the guy who invented this discipline just wanted to mess around. Bad luck, the English and their legendary humor said to themselves “hey, a boring sport, which lasts for hours, with imbitable rules? This is exactly what we need! « . These troublemakers have even gone so far as to export cricket to their colonies, which have since had a hard time getting rid of it. The invasions of crickets, it’s a beautiful bitch!
5. The mess with the names of fries
Crisps that are called crisps, big thick fries that are crisps, not to be confused with potatoe wedges, while fries mean thin fries… But what the hell?! Give us POTATOES! It’s still not complicated!
6. The absence of window shutters!
Who are these people who decided that it was perfectly possible to do without shutters on the windows. It is therefore necessary to opt for good big opacifying curtains, which in addition to not being absolutely outdated, nevertheless allow the light of the early morning to pass through. On the other hand, it is true that they are perfectly matched with the ugly carpet on the floor!
7. Their SNCF even worse off than ours
The privatization of trains was implemented in England in the early 90s and as much to say right away, it’s been a hell of a mess! Outdated infrastructure, reservation systems in the street that cause fights when it comes to knowing which of the 8 people who have reserved the same seat will have the right to sit there… The English prove that it is sometimes enough to look at what is going on. passes around you to tell yourself that you are not so badly off!
8. The old-fashioned cult of the Monarchy
While the French hunt down people with particle names like mosquitoes on a summer evening, the English on their side continue to idolize their Queen and all her smala. And too bad, if this little pleasure, a bit kitchoune, costs them three times what it earns them each year in tourism and in charms bearing the effigy of the royal family.
9. The absence of a mixer on their taps (and therefore of lukewarm water)
The English clearly did not invent lukewarm water. With them, you have the choice between scalding yourself with the (too) hot water tap, or freezing your skin with the (too) cold water tap. No trace of mixers to hope to have water at the right temperature. Undoubtedly the most stupid British particularity even before that of the steering wheel on the right.
10. Stubbornly eat cheese with crackers
Even if Cheddar, the most famous cheese in England, looks more like a piece of plastic to chew on, Great Britain remains a country of cheeses with more than 700 varieties with flavors as varied and full-bodied as the recipes of our country. On the other hand, eating cheese on crackers is a crime against majesty! As if in France, an unconscious decided to eat a good camembert with Wasa!
11. Their all-gunned sockets that we can’t plug anything into at home
Going to England without an adapter is more dangerous than crossing the desert in a fleet canteen.
12. The fact that everything is closed super early
Don’t expect to go shopping after 5pm, when most stores begin to close.
13. The pronunciation of the word « through »
Invented only to relieve non-English speakers, I see no other explanation.